just had a great dinner today. home alone having a good steak and a corona.. watching television.. nice. I'm glad Ross and Rachel from FRIENDS ended up together. They're one of my favorite fictional couples.

edit//

Watching the Founders' Day slideshow always puts a smile on my face.. sigh. I miss you guys.

It is really hard to sleep at night for some reason.. First, i hate being sick. I wish I could sleep my summer away. For once, i want to go back to school. Second, staying up tossing and turning with nothing to do.. sucks. I like the night, but being at home alone is just cruel.

Tan NGO muon di nhau voi anh em TKO.. uong nhieu bia.. uong nhieu ruou.. di hut thuoc.. di choi voi nhieu con gai.. T.T quen mot nguoi.. o nha Mustang.. Tan muon dien khung..! o nha chi coi Facebook.. khong co lam gi nua het.. KHONG MUON SUY NGHI VE CON GAI!! Tan Ngo ghet con gai lam.. Tan Ngo can mot nguoi ban de lam tinh.. lol i mean tam su.. chia se. sigh. Anh Tan nho em lam.. <3 I am so bored. I am so pathetic. Gotta let it go

hmm.. today woke up.. had a big argument with my dad on the phone.. i could've avoided but whatever. i think it may be the first time i spoke my mind. he always thinks he's right.. oh well.

today i went to go pick up some tires then went to firestone so they could put them on.. it was only 2 new tires to put on the back and i got my alignment fixed.. so wahoo. although I did wait for 3 or 4 hours at the place.. they said it would only take an hour or 2.

as I was waiting I watched what was on the news. some interesting stuff but then they kept airing it over and over.. there was thing how rachel ray on the dunkin donuts ad is offensive because she wore this scarf that resembled a terrorist scarf thing.. dumb

there was this thing on this man that has very large tumors on his face. it was like half of his face was hanging down to his chest or something. He was a cashier at a grocery store. I was kind of touched by it because people say he has this great attitude at work and makes customers smile and stuff. thats cool because no matter what you look like you just have to be happy with yourself, so don't expect people to like you if you dislike yourself!

another thing that was probably the biggest issue were these kids that were taken away from their parents, from a polygamy ranch in Texas. the issue was that the federal court in texas ruled to return the children to the parents but then there were a 100 kids that they didn't know who the kids belonged to even though they had DNA tests and stuff.. and this sect leader had pictures kissing a 12 year old girl.. yeah

besides that i just read some sports magazines.. afterwards went to play soccer at this park with vinh, quang, and a lot of mexican people.. i'm still sick so i was coughing and stuff. those people are really friendly, though. I might make this soccer thing a regular thing for the rest of the summer... welll thats it for now

Today i went to norman.. turned in financial aid stuff.. i saw hieu's car at the union.. drove to charlie's.

charlie, binh, T.ha, Ti, and julie were there.. we just hung around and did nothing.. it was great..

they noticed i lost weight and looked skinnier

someone asks charlie.. "what are you cooking?".. charlie answers "chicken". i thought that was funny.. it's always chicken.

thanks for the "helix remix".. a very thoughtful gift indeed.. very sweet. literally.

we ate some and they played poker.. i headed home.. watch seinfeld.

life is dull

he will make you silky smooth..

i'm still listening to that Drive My Soul song by LIGHTS.. I will get tired of it eventually.

Today.. I went to OCCC. I saw Nhi. Went to eat at BWW with Kevin, Binh, T. Ha, Tammy, Li2z, and Emilio. I picked up my car, although its not totally fixed. I can't wait till i get new tires and the alignment fixed. So later I just stayed home and then cleaned up for a little bit then I got a phone call from Ti. YES, free showings of Don't Mess with the Zohan. I got the privilege to take someone with me. I decided to take my brother. The theatre was crowded. The movie was pretty funny.. but very perverted.. I think i will try to grow out my hair this summer. Thanks a lot Ti and Julie!

This day is one of those days I imagine summer would be, but all the time. Like i would be so busy with fun stuff to do. Lunch with friends, movie, or swimming, and stuff. Oh well.. to Norman tomorrow!

damn, tiep left me hanging again.. I'll never call you up anymore!!!

DRIVE MY SOUL by Lights..

its a cool song.

have you ever wondered what true love really is, despite how wonderful your life is with your significant other? is it the feeling of the moment, when you are with that someone, and you don't even have to be in each other's arms, but it just feels perfect like the world exists for you at that very moment? Is love the caring for the other even when you know you will not get in return? Those long nights that you have staying up wondering how the other person is doing. Your mind wanders and worry about that other person, forgetting your own well-being. You may even have sacrificed many things for this person without this person knowing and/or appreciating but you never cared or asked for anything in return but for that person to know that you even exist.

Can love really conquer all? Will your status in society really mean nothing when it comes to love? Will you disobey your parents to be with the one you believe you love? Let's say Ethan is a regular man that has graduated from a high school from Smallville from the top of his graduating class. Keep in mind he attended a regular high school to attend a grand, fabulous University. His grades are not great, but actually inches from horrible. Some may have say he had fucked up. But in the midst of it all, he has found the motivation to work for the grades he knows he deserves. This motivation he found from his family, and maybe the biggest, his "love" Valerie. They went to high school together but she is two grades younger. She left Smallville to go to a boarding school of high honor.

Valerie goes to this school and suffers from the lack of freedom and vigorous classes and studying. Valerie has met new friends and become close with a lot of boys and goes to prom with one of the boys but didn't tell Ethan until Ethan finds out. Of course, there relationship has been rocky from the beginning but for some reason there is something holding them together. Ethan, a good, honest man with principles has never laid a finger on another girl besides Valerie thinks of her all the time, wondering how she is doing in a strange school with strangers. Valerie's mom knows of this relationship but encourages Valerie to forget Ethan and move on to someone more fitting, because Ethan is known to be a slacker.

What is this bond really from Ethan and Valerie? Is it love? Realistically, it is a bond formed over many courses of experiences together and just spending time together and sharing so much between the two. If there was love in this situation they would somehow overcome these obstacles and just care for the well-being of each other, it would work out and be so simple. There is a theory that if every single human on this planet wanted to do a single something, they could do it. That would mean if any two people put effort into one thing, their relationship, they could do anything. This effort could possibly be called love?

I've always wondered.. How do people move on from their first, real, deep relationship? It must be really hard because the people still stuck in it don't realize there must be something better out there. They're just there, being hurt, and keep on hoping that somehow this precious relationship will mend itself and everything will be the same. Of course, this isn't going to happen if only one person wants it to work. First loves staying together is definitely possible, of course..

I find females are the greatest evils of all evil. The media portrays men as assholes of the world, which i have to agree sometimes but not even half the time. I think women are so scandalous and manipulative. They are born that way so they can survive within their own kind, in my opinion. There's always gossip, cheating, and lies. Women tend to tear brotherhood apart and eat them alive. Just kidding.. but I think women are a lot worse than men in what I've seen. The smart ones are scandalous and manipulative, anyways. I think usually when "boys" first tend to "love" they don't have much experience so they tend to hurt the "girl". After experience these "boys" grow up to be "men" and meet other "girls" that have grown up to be "women". By this time these "women" have grown some self-defense mechanism of hurt!

So how do you let a girl know that what you feel towards her is very sincere, even when you try to let her know it over and over again? I wonder if there are any books that show how a female thinks..

its very weird seeing people that were together not together but they should be together because sometimes... you're just wasting time and hurting yourself in between!

anyways..

My life hasn't changed much.. I'm still ill.. sick with it.. you know what i mean. yeah.. today i bought some robitussin to see if it helps.

Yesterday I mowed the lawn. it was pretty nice to be productive or something. It felt kinda breezy outside. I like mowing the lawn listening while listening to the radio or just music.. its really chill. Mowing the lawn is my favorite chore if there is one. So it took me about 3 hours then i played some basketball. showered. went to liz's house but she wasn't even there. just hung out with don and paulinna then she went home then hung out with don and tammy. we just played facebook games and watched videos on youtube.. i decided to go home.. took them home. actually just tammy because don wanted to run home. I went home.. I was confronted for something.. grr. I pretty much did an all nighter. I hate when people do stuff to me that makes me stay up all night.

Today I just did nothing. went to vinhs sisters (my cousin) birthday at golden palace. Yes, they had crawfish.. it wasn't fresh, though. yea then went home.. went to wal mart.. buy the robitussin and some oj. stayin home tomorrow. doing nothing. tuesday i will run some errands.. cross fingers... i miss the padre days..

all I wanted was to be yours..

iF i won the Lotto.. I would be your everything you wanted.

pretty shitty summer.. so something came up. I don't think I can take summer classes.. which means i won't live in norman.. which means.. i won't be able to work..

well, I've been sick with the flu lately. It is a shitty feeling.

I've been in bed watching korean movies and stuff. I came across this Japanese drama called 'Absolute Boyfriend'. So what the thing is that there is this company that makes robots. They came up with this thing where they create the ideal boyfriend.

So this ideal boyfriend thing.. how does it work? The girl takes this thing on a computer.. kinda like a quiz or multiple choice test but its questions like "How do you like your ideal boyfriend's body to be?" and it'll be like "A. skinny B. muscular C. fat D. model" and other questions like how you like would you like the ideal boyfriend to be not jealous at all, a little jealous, or really jealous... and sexual preference questions and stuff.

I thought it was pretty interesting but then thinking about it, it is pretty creepy. actually.. really creepy. This ideal bf was shipped to this girls house in a box. To activate him she had to kiss him. That isn't that creepy but its just creepy with other stuff if you think about it.

anyways.. there are plenty of perfect men out there.. if there is anything the world needs it is an ideal woman.. bah!

i guess for fun i will create my ideal girlfriend.. RIGHT nOW!! woo

let's start off physically..

she would be an asian girl.. a nice asian girl. a nice vietnamese asian girl. I would like her to be shorter than me, of course. I think about 5'2".. I think. Short enough when she wears heels she is still shorter than me a good amount, you know? hmm.. alright.. she has to have nice skin.. usually asian girls have nice skin. If skin is important to a girl, it is to me! I like healthy, clear, glowing skin. I don't like pale though.. there's a difference.

i also like cute hands, fingers, feet, toes, and nice legs. it sounds creepy but I don't like girls with hairy toes or dry hands. A girl that can wear flip flops and a short skirt showing off her pretty feet and gorgeous legs is a plus! oh yeah, legs have to be proportional to the girl's body.

hmm in general her body is in good shape.. she can be about 105 to 113 lbs... it seems kinda heavy but i don't like skinny girls that show ribs and stuff. generally girls too skinny will show bony hands and fingers which is unattractive to me.. i don't want a fragile girlfriend..

hmm.. chest and booty wise.. I go for proportional. I don't really like big-breasted females.. I like them big enough you know it is a female and that it serves its purpose.. the rear end.. just proportional and complements the nice legs and healthy thighs! but remember, I am big on proportion!!

I guess her face now.. I don't really know how to describe an ideal face.. i guess its just something you decide if you like or not.. but i like eyes that are the right size.. not too small.. not too big like dolls which make them creepy.. i like small, cute noses so when she squints it is really cute. She should have some cheeks.. not huge.. just some. What i'm trying to say is a girl with a cute pretty face.

now for personality wise.. I like the more conservative girl. She is conservative but there are times she yearns to break the rules. She is the girl that works hard and knows what is important and is family oriented. She is the girl that can adore male celebrities but doesn't really like guys until she thinks he is the one. She is conservative but she knows how to have fun with a lot of friends (in ethical ways)!

I would like her to be smart.. she doesn't have to be smart smart.. just not stupid and try really hard. she can be a ditz at times and I would remind her things or explain to her about things. She is educated so we can have stimulating and intellectual conversations even though she is not a genioius but we can carry on an interesting conversation over coffee.. This girl would be really sweet and caring.. the kind you abuse and neglect at first you realize that she was the one good thing in your life.

This girl would have to be down to earth.. she's got to be real.. none of those fake crap. This girl wouldn't care what her parents think even if her bf was a bad boy.. oo.. This ideal girl would appreciate crocs but don't like the way they look.. because she does have a good sense of fashion but is also practical. She appreciates fashion and knows it but she doesn't dress her potential all the time. She dress conservatively on a normal basis and knows how to impress her man. simple black eyeliner here and then is more than enough for me! but when there are those special occasions like TKO founders' day or my birthday, make up is much appreciated with the less conservative outfit, if you know what i mean ;0)

She would like to play video games.. like guitar hero.. try wow.. she don't have to like it.. play a lil sports once in a while, maybe go running with me. sometimes i like a girl that get on me for being crazy. for example, if I drink she will on my ass and hitting me and stuff but when i throw up or have a hangover she will be there taking care of me. I prefer she doesn't drink herself..I like having soup when i'm sick and stuff. When I'm cleaning my room she comes over and helps me clean because she likes to and it's just more fun that way.

Hmm. that's all for now I think.. i don't think that is too much to ask for, do you? please don't feel offended or anything.. it is only an ideal girl, after all.. hope you enjoyed the entry.. comment or reply so I know there is someone out there doing nothing but on the computer like I am.. feel free to create your ideal bf or gf.. i'd be interested in reading that. Happy Summertime!

seems like I finally hit the bottom..

summer 2008

i checked my grades.. looks like I won't be getting kicked out of OU... this time. haha

South Padre.. what a great start to my summer. I am just afraid I set the fun standard too high and nothing will satisfy me for the rest of the summer. That is probably true.. bah!

SPI was really fun though.. Too bad we came at a time people aren't there yet so it feels like we are alone most of the time. There are perks like we feel like we own the place and it is just a time to chill and relax with the bros but then there are not really girls around. When there aren't a lot of girls around you will start to think any girl is cute ( Long ).

First we had to travel through Texas to get to our final destination. We went through Dallas, Austin, and San Antonio. I feel like if I were to move out of state I would move to Texas. It seem really fun. Anyways, we stopped in San Antonio to eat by the riverwalk thing and then decided to go to El Mercado. We loitered in the sun figuring how to get to the place. We finally found out and paid a dollar each to ride the trolley. We reached El Mercado to make rings but it didn't work out. We walked back to our cars. Oh yeah, when we parked this bitch lady thought we didn't pay for our parking and made a big deal about it when we did. There were two camry's, the red one i was in and the tan one that long and others were in. We were the one that parked at the place but the others decided not to. I guess she got confused with the asian people and the camrys.

so we head to SPI.. i love car rides. our car had interesting conversations I am sure other cars had but yeah.. it was interesting. we talked about things like cars, ethical questions, environment, science, politics, economy, and of course girls and past relationships and many other things.

we reached SPI at 10 or 11 pm.. we went exploring. Our condo was nice.. we stayed up playing drinking games that first night. the games didn't turn out right. the drinking rate was too high. we finished a case of corona in like 20 or 30 minutes. blind man's bluff i was owning. the other card game i was just unfortunate.. i was out for the night.

the next day we went driving around and played basketball with tiep and trina. the van arrived and later we played football in the swimming pool. it was great. i don't remember too much about the days afterwards or what order. We played basketball with the locals one night and we dominated. The guys went out to late night fishing out in the dock and chilling out at the hotel lobby and the pool. Older guys went clubbing and stuff. Every day and night there were always drinking games and stupid things that go on. We would watch play off games on TV and play video games. We went to the beach for the whole day one day and drank beer and played in the waves and played volleyball and had birds shit on some of us. we had ice cream and ate at daddy's for crawfish and 35 cent oysters.

there were a lot of things that went on that i don't remember. we headed home thursday morning and didn't make any stops besides gas stops. we were supposed to go to nike store but something came up. we stopped in dallas to eat at tokyo one. reached norman at 1 and i got home at 2. what a fun trip... summer is only beginning

i NEVER want to see you again. i do HOPE you go to college out of state. i hope your family does move away. i just don't want to see your face anymore. i don't want to see your NAME, hear it, or anything. i have never hated anyone. i HATE you.. oh, how i HATE you... the way you make me feel, the decisions you make me decide, the way I am.. I HATE how i wait around for you and think of you ALL the time. I HATE YOU

if you just realize..

Well, well.. finals are over. I think I did good except for one. Blah.. Finals are over, which means the semester is over. I think I've ended this semester in an okay way. It would've been great if not for stuff, but it is okay.

This last week was just cramming time for finals I guess. I finally got paid, so wahoo! It doesn't matter because I work for a reason to pay off a debt. So last weekend I did something I knew I shouldn't have done but it made me feel better for that moment but now it will ruin a relationship with someone I feel is close with and I care about, but it is okay. At least I won't see anyone for a while...

I've also picked up this hobbie. Err, a rather unhealthy hobbie. Parties have been coming and stuff and I've got into this smoking thing which I used to think is rather stupid but I still think is stupid. It is not the first time I've smoked something but I actually kind of enjoy it. I call it a hobbie because I only do it once in a while and it is not a habit. At least it isn't, yet. I don't think it will be a habit because I have it in control so don't worry. I am aware how unattractive it is to females but I don't really care, because I don't impress people for anything.

Why do I smoke? I don't really know. It is just when a bunch of guys together talking and drinking about stuff it is a stimulant or something that causes us to bond. It is really nice, but only once in a while! I also find it very poetic and sentimental for some reason. It is also symbolic. I think I thought of this when I was halfway drunk but.. yeah. I think smoking represents a relationship with women. A cigarette looks nice or whatever like a woman would or whatever. It just looks cool. It might smell nice, referring to a Black and Mild or a cigar, so I guess you might smell it or play around with it in your hand. I guess this refers to when a man is interested in a woman and just talks or flirts with her and/or even dating.

So when does the relationship begin? The relationship begins when you light the cigarette or cigar or whatever. This is when both has acknowledged the relationship is about to begin. Once you put your lips on the butt, my man, you have committed yourself to a relationship. You thought it was going to be nice, didn't you? First, it is exciting. It is weird. It is new. You must know that the more you inhale, the faster you are dying. She enters your soul, blackens your lungs, and demands from you. Some days you realize you must give up but some days you can't give her up.

Some men settle for cigarettes, regualar or lite (the fun and spontaneous, maybe even slutty), some settle for the menthol (refreshing and minty), some settle for cigars (the high class, sophisticated and refined, and long-lasting), and some settle for cigarillos, which are better than cigarettes but not yet a cigar, because you don't want the commonness of the cigarette but you can't afford the cigar. Some men settle for cigarettes that are longer. All that they are doing is just having the same slutty poison but having her stick around for a little longer.

So you might wonder, "when do i find the right one for me? The one that will be by myside until we grow old together?" Well, I believe the one you stay with is the one that you will die smoking. Let's hope it is a nice Cuban cigar.

So enough of the smoking thing. I smoke because sometimes I feel lonely and it is nice to relax and look at the sky. So yes, I am done with finals and now I am home drinking my smart water i bought from Xcetera with my leftover points. Where was I? I'll just talk about how I ended my school semester. So Tony has been asking me to go to Dallas with him and loan, CT, and Tim. I agreed at first but later there were stuff that made me think twice and made me uncertain but I ended up going because Tony paid for everything ;).

I am pretty glad I went but for some reason whenever I go on trips it always gets ruined because my dad calls or something and I am just mopey. Luckily for me, I was with a group of great people that I love. First we went to the hotel to check in and then we went to go eat at Bistro B's. I had the red rice thingy with cubed beef looking thing and I got a coconut jelly dessert thing. Afterwards we went to Dave and Buster's and it was pretty cool there. There are video games and beer, man! Well, drinking for older folks of course. There was this basketball shooting game thing that I was playing that I liked but then later all these kids came and kept hogging it. Oh well.. we got a bunch of tickets though. We got all these tickets because Tony is awesome at this one game and yeah. HAHA. Right. It was nice though because I saw some pretty white girls there but too bad they're probably in high school.. hahaha.

Afterwards we went to the best part of the night.. KOREAN KARAOKE BAR! At first, it looks like this ghetto warehouse thing but going inside, it is exactly how i've imagined it to be. There are all these korean people and these posters on the wall for sale. There is this little bar with alcohol. There are many private rooms for parties and stuff. There are two sofas and a little coffee table with a disco light going around and around. There were two binders with very updated songs that I amazed us. There were two microphones and this funky looking remote to selct your songs. We had a great time. Loan bought us beer and had a merry time. I noticed how Loan and Tony are so cute together. When Tony laughs and sings he reminds me of a little boy. Too bad there were so many songs we wanted to sing but we had to leave. It was a great time.

We went back to the hotel. I showered and slept on the small bed thing. It was pretty nice but I was cold the whole night because Tony turned on the a/c really high. The next morning we left before noon and headed home. We bought some McD's and yeah. We arrived in norman and I picked up my truck and took care of some business. I used up all my remaining meal points to buy drinks and junk food for home. So off to home I went.

This year has been a wild year. It's already been a year.. Attending college is a really different experience. It is really going to feel different not being the young one. I will actually feel like the one that belongs at college and all these people that will come in feeling all weird and stuff. I never really thought I would be in a fraternity. I came in not knowing what brotherhood is, but now I think if anyone ever needed to know what it is, I can't explain it but I could try. This brotherhood thing taught me how to be a better brother to my own little brother, which is weird but it is true. I've met the most awesome people in my life. They were strangers to me but we became bonded by a single cause.

It was really scary how my GPA sucked ass first semester. So much happened this year but it was a great experience. I never thought I would meet so many people. I never thought I would know so many people that cared for me, that aren't even in the fraternity. I never knew I would drink so much and get so trashed. I never knew I could dance. There are so many memories.. so many memories. Thanks Tau Kappa Omega.

Congratulations to Long and Tony. I'll be at your graduation tomorrow. OFF TO PADRE ON SUNDAY!!!

bUsTed!

Today, I slept pretty much all day at Charlie's. I tried to study but no success. Ti and I went to go eat at Burger King after he woke up. We were watching the Hornets and Spurs game. It was a good game. I would like to see the Hornets win.. especially over the Spurs! So Ti went home and I went to shower and prepared to go to the party at the Lambdas'.

So I stop at Charlie's to tape my toe nail because it kept bothering me as I put my sock on, as if my toe nail would come off. It kind of hurt but yeah. I actually came to steal some cologne. So afterwards I went to the gas station to get something then to T's house. I noticed cops at the party so yeah. We chilled at T's for a bit until it was good to go.

We walked over to the party and yeah. I felt very welcomed and everyone was just friendly. My goal was to congratulate the new class and I did not plan on drinking because I made a deal with Tammy if she drank I would not. I took a shot but that was it because yeah. So the night progresses and later the party is busted again and we all go inside the bedroom. Li2z tells me she was glad I did not plan to drink because I am loud when I am drunk, apparently. After some waiting we are clear to go so I take Tammy and Emily home. I go to Charlie's and then yeah...............................................................................................................................................................


I hope it will be the same, if not better. =)

The End is Near

This year is coming to an end.. finals are within reach. I need to do well on my ZOO final.

Last night was fun. It will be a while until there will be something like last night. I will miss you Long and Tony. I'm glad I will spend some time with them after finals on our vacation trip, though. It is going to be fun!

Tonight will be a night I need to get through. I've been doing something that's really unhealthy lately and just bad for me but I think I'm getting addicted to it. It's just something that makes the time go by a little easier for the moment.